Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Discovering a Sense of Personal Territory (Part 2 of 2)

Energy Debts

Whatever is worth doing at all is worth doing well. ~ Lord Chesterfield

My mother used to always tell me, “If you are going to do something, do it right the first time.” I guess that is where my perfectionism came from. I hate doing a painting twice. I think I better get it right the first time, so it takes me forever to get it done.

As artists, we tend to be generous people; we don’t know when to say no. We need to learn what our true selves need and say no more often. We must feed our inner self so we will have a sense of well-being.

Julia Cameron says, “As people and as artists, we crave to be seen for who and what we really are. If we are in relationships where the dividends we need are never extended back to us, that is a bad investment….We must ask not only ‘Do I love this person?’ but ‘Is this relationship self-loving?’ Any relationship that risks your artist’s identity is not.”

Stay away from those who are needy, who think you are at their beck and call. They drain you physically and mentally. When it is time for us to create, there is nothing there…every creative thing has been drained from our being. I've been a victim to this and find it very true.

The art of being wise is the art of knowing what to overlook. ~ William James

This doesn’t mean to stop being nice altogether. It means to know what things you can physically do for someone without draining your creative bucket. The other person needs to acknowledge you for who you are and what you are doing for them. Sometimes we are the one who needs nurtured instead of us always being the one who is nurturing.

Sometimes when I’ve been so busy helping others and not making room for art, I get grouchy. Not just a little grouchy, a lot grouchy. I begin to resent the people I love and the people I’m helping. I think that is true for a lot of us.

Julia states, “When we learn to set boundaries, we begin to experience a sense of faith. Why? Because we feel safe.” I love to feel safe, don't you?

Every exit is an entry somewhere else. ~ Tom Stoppard

I am experiencing an exit in my life right exit from a job I've had for 15 yrs. It is definately scary and a choice I made on my own to quit. I'm excited to see what the entry to somewhere else will be!

You all are wonderful!


Rose Welty said...

Valerie - Good on you for the job change, I'm sure you'll look back and be glad. And, I know what you mean about the grumps, all week I've been grouchy and it's because I can't get the art going how I want! :D

My husband ran across something interesting a few months back, someone said, "if it's worth doing, it's worth doing poorly." The idea was that if you wait to do things properly, some of those things never get done. So, some things are worth doing poorly, because at least they get done. That's been a bit of a revelation for us.

Jo Castillo said...

My husband's saying to the kids was, "If you don't have time to do it right, what makes you think you have time to do it over?"

Good luck on the job change. It must be the time....